PAULINE WRIGHT NICHOLS PEPINSKY-June 27, 1919-November 25,
2013
Hal Pepinsky, pepinsky@indiana.edu,
“peacemaking” at pepinsky.blogspot.com
November 25, 2013
My Mama died this morning. She died having held her great grandchildren,
Mila, 5, and Evan, 3, of Durango, Colorado, as recently as last summer. She died at peace. Her eyes had closed, and she had stopped
eating and drinking, 6 days ago, probably the result of another in a years’
long line of strokes. She was well
attended her last several days, and kept comfortable till her heart stopped, by
Hospice. I thank them for ensuring that
my mother had a good death. Hospice is
indeed a blessing in all their work.
More profoundly, I thank the staff of the Laurels of Worthington for the
last 3 years of such loving, tender care they offered my Mama. As they know, I will return to join Director
Kristine Provan there Thursday mornings on the north sun porch for sing-alongs. For more than a decade before retirement, I
joined a friend in Bloomington, Indiana, Mable Linder, to sing in nursing homes
and at an adult day center. Kristine and
the Laurels have given me a home near home in Worthington to continue to enjoy
the closest thing to a worship service I have found for myself. I have special respect for all those who care
for the aged and the dying, and the Laurels of Worthington is the most special place
of its kind I have spent time in.
In 1951 when I was 6, my Mama
sent me up the hill from our apartment at 81 Selby Blvd. in Worthington, to
Sunday school at the Methodist church now 2 blocks from Jill and me, to “learn
about the Bible.” In recent months of
bringing memories of her back into my mind, I have remembered asking her early
on whether she believed in God. Her reply: “God is love.” It occurs to me that I have spent my entire
life trying to discover what “love” entails—to identify it, and as my parents
never ceased asking me to figure out, to notice violence and human separation
and how to transform it. At root, it has
been the challenge of redeeming myself in the eyes of her God and mine, that
has become the calling I refer to as “peacemaking,” her greatest gift to me.
I will in due course write an
obituary celebrating a range of my mother’s talents, insights, gifts and
generosity. I have asked the funeral
director to divide her ashes in two: half to be laid beside my dad’s ashes in
the graveyard among Pepinsky’s at St. Peter’s Episcopal Church near Paoli, PA;
the other half for Jill and me to spread here at Mama’s home and ours, 519
Evergreen Circle. In late April or May,
as spring blossoms, Jill and I will host a memorial party celebrating my Mama’s
life. Love and peace--hal
(From Sam L.) You've explained a lot over the years about your mother, childhood, etc... We've also discussed a lot about her nursing home years, and explained well--your views--so I know your at peace.... Sam
ReplyDeleteOur thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. No other words can do justice to a life well lived, and your mother had that, to be sure.
ReplyDeletethank you both--l&p
ReplyDelete